PA German Dialect

Es Neinuhr Schtick

1-22-04

Ihr liewe Leit:

   Un die Louise A. Weitzeln (1862-1934) was hot sie vun Sickeretts zu saage ghatt? Do iss ihr Gedicht ass uns saagt genaa was sie zu saage hot, "Sickeretts":

Es iss en faermlich Fiewer,
'S fresst um sich wie der Gretz;
Die Weibsleit wie die Mannsleit,
Sie schmooke Sickeretts.

Sie schmooke rechts un schmooke links,
Un schmooke Daag un Nacht;
Un daer wu ebbes degege saagt,
Der watt yuscht ausgelacht.

Die annere Mensche hen ken Recht,
Die diesent wolle sei;
Die Luft iss iwwerall vergift,
Un schtinkich owwedrei.

Es iss net gut fer yunge Leit,
Die Alde batt's aa nix;
Es geht mit Buus un Kaardeschpiel,
Un allerhand so Tricks.

Die Aussichde fer unser Land,
Es kummt mir vor sin schlecht:
'S hot nimmand kee Reschpeckt fer Laa
Un annere ihre Recht.

   Un wer weess mehner vun de Aussichde fer unser Land ass der Wendell Kitzmiller (der Dr. Ezra Grumbine, 1845-1923). Es waar so um 1900 wie er erzeehlt hot ass er mol ee Owet noch em Nachtesse en marrickwaddicher Draam ghatt hot, villeicht weil er en Schisselvol iwwergewarremdes Sauergraut fer Dessert ghatt hot.

Er hot gedraamt er waer eigschloofe un hett en dausent Yaahr gschloofe. Nadierlich waar alles annerscht wie er uffgewacht iss. Zum Beischpiel, die Wedderprofeede waare all in die Narreheiser gschparrt, un die Wedderbisness waar dotgange, "wie sie sott" (saagt uns der Wendell).

   Die Schtroosse waare nimmi viel geyuust warre weil yeder in Balluuns getraewwelt hot. Der Mond war schunn lang in die Union genumme, un es iss schtarrig geblaudert warre fer der Planet Mars zu annexe.

   Un dann shreibt der Kitzmiller: "Die Leit iewen in 2800 schunn sin viel elder warre ass fer alders. Wie sie mol en Laa ghatt hen ass ken Sickeretts meh gemacht un gschmookt darrefe warre, iss nimmand meh yung gschtarrewe, un endlich waar's en gans kammen Ding ass Leit sex bis nein hunnert Yaahr alt sin warre! Sie hen ausgefunne ass die Sickaretts die Ursache waare vun de Deitsche Reedle, vun der Auszeehring, un vum Gretz!

   "Wie ich des der Saere Tscheen verzeehlt hab wie ich wacker bin warre, hot sie gsaat: "Ei, wann sie's doch numme schunn eheder ausgfunne hette!"

Macht's gut,
Der Alt Professer

Dear people:

   And Louise A. Weitzel (1862-1934) what did she have to say about cigarettes? Here is her poem that tells us exactly what she had to say, "Cigarettes":

It is a veritable fever,
It eats about itself like the itch;
Womenfolk as well as menfolk,
The smoke cigarettes.

They smoke right and they smoke left,
And smoke day and night;
And he who says something against it,
He's just laughed at.

Other people have no rights,
Who want to be decent;
The air is everywhere poisoned,
And stinky on top of that.

It isn't good for young people,
It doesn't help the old either;
It goes with booze and playing cards,
And all sorts of tricks like that.

The prospects for our country,
It seems to me, are bad;
Nobody has any respect for law
And other people's rights.

   And who knows more about the prospects for our country than Wendell Kitzmiller (Dr. Ezra Grumbine, 1845-1923). It was around 1900 when he related that he once had after supper a remarkable dream, perhaps because he had eaten a bowlful of warmed-over sauerkraut for dessert.

   He dreamed that he had fallen asleep and had slept for a thousand years. Naturally everything was different when he woke up. For example, the weather prophets had all been locked up in insane asylums, and the weather business had died/gone dead, "as it should" (Wendell tells us).

The streets weren't being used much anymore because everyone was traveling in balloons. The moon had long been taken into the Union, and they were strongly urging that the planet Mars be annexed.

   And then Kitzmiller writes: "the people even in 2800 were already getting older that in past times.
When they once had a law that cigarettes could no longer be made and smoked, nobody died young anymore, and finally it was a very common thing that people got to be six to nine hundred years old! They found out that cigarettes were the cause or German measles, of consumption and the itch!

   "When I told that to Sara Jane when I woke up, she said: "Oh, if only they had found that out sooner!"

Take care,
The Old Professor

Click here to go to PA German Dialect archive page.

The Pennsylvania German Society
Located in the Zimmerman Cabin

at the Pennsylvania German Cultural Heritage Center

22 Luckenbill Road

Ephrata, PA 19522

Our mailing address is:

The Pennsylvania German Society

P.O. Box 118
Ephrata, PA 19522
(484) 646-4227
Fax: (484) 646-4228
E-mail: pgs@kutztown.edu

updated 3-15-2007 paf